Life…and other important stuff.

I heard a song today, and the chorus struck me to my core. The song is titled “I Love Myself So Much” and it’s commonly sung and celebrated at Agape International Spiritual Center by the community that has come together to celebrate life and love.

The chorus was:

I love myself so much…that I can love you so much…and you can love you so much…that you can start loving me.

Is that not the most profound thing you’ve heard lately?

We live in a society in which loving ourself is considered self-centered (well, yeah…it’s supposed to be!), greedy and punishable by social contempt. But think about the message behind this chorus. I love me enough to have overflow of love to pass on to you. Then, with that love, I pass unspoken permission on to do the same for yourself. I love myself enough that I’m not going to judge you for being, feeling and emanating love. Go ahead! I benefit because it comes back to me in kind.

Powerful.

And – consider this; you cannot give something away that you do not have. And if you are not giving away love, what are you giving away? By nature, we are energy in some form at all times. If you are not giving away love…I dare you to think about what you are giving away. There are lots of things that are the opposite of love; hate, fear, dread, grief, spite, false pretense, lies, denial, blame, etc. This list of opposites is BIG, but trust me…love is BIGGER.

You are bigger. You are love. And, as Dr. Sue Morter shared in today’s service, “big beings take on really big projects and they get started early because there’s so much to do. A lot to unfold. A lot to awaken to. It is up to you, it is up to me. I must decide that I am not only worthy… I am the responsible steward when I say yes to myself.”

Even more powerful, yes?

How are you saying yes to yourself today? And, before you do – I want to thank you because ultimately, you are saying yes to me and everyone around you as well. So, thank you.

With deep and wide love for you and your projects in life,

Brittany

I have to assume you read this blog because you care about something. You are passionate about your wellness, your family, the work that you do and the way you spend your time. You are, in essesence, an advocate for yourself and others in many ways if these words speak to you.

Our time and energy are so precious and there are many things in this world to be passionate about – today, I ask you to be mindful of how you express that passion and if it truly works toward your ultimate goals in life.

Some people swim against the tide, hoping to make a difference. Some find their niche within the tide and do an outstanding job working along side others who have the power to make positive change happen for everyone. The type of passionate energy you put forth is the same type of response you will elicit – so if it is positive, collaborative and kind, the same will come back to you. In other words, be specific with the elements you are working with: fire and gasoline create explosions, fire and wood create lasting warmth and sustenance.

Please understand that I’m not simply asking you to “go with the flow”, I’m asking you know your power in and out and where it is best spent.

One day at a time this world is changing for the better simply because you are in it. Take care of yourself, be mindful of your interactions with others and whether or not your energy is adding to the positive movement or creating barriers along the way.

With love and respect for how powerful you are and how worthy your causes are in this world,

Brittany

Life = a collection of powerful moments that only affect you if you are mindful of their power.

How has your summer been? I’m hoping this post finds you all doing well and absorbing the amazing energy that the summer season brings. This is a longer than usual post, so I’ve inserted a *quick version* area for those not wanting to read the entire post.

It has been an incredibly busy summer for me. There has been plenty of transition with moving into a new house, selling the home I lived in for many years, an internship in the near future, a new direction in my career and generally living out of boxes and suitcases for the past few months. As I unpack the boxes and attempt to be very present in the moments that do feel settled, calm and [a new]  familiar, I’ve realized something that has changed my perspective greatly. As usual, I wanted to share with my incredible readers, clients, friends and family.

Think of the last time that you had a major transition in your life. It could be a job change, home adjustment, relationship or loss of a friend or family member. In this transition, what got you through it? Was it relying on what you knew? standing firm in your value system? Denying that the change would be hard – putting a smile on your face and pushing forward? There are so many ways to deal with change, what is yours?

Now that you have checked in with your norm, I want to present you with a different way to take on your next transition.

Live in the unknown.

This internship is a perfect example. I was furious with their demand that I find an extra 20 hours in my week to do things I had already done in my career?! Then it hit me; what about what I don’t know? Is there a possibility that this opportunity is making its way into my life because it brings a major life lesson with it? Of course. Nothing in this world happens without a lesson attached, it’s our job to be open enough to absorb it. If we never make ourselves aware of this reality, we are certain to fall prey to feeling like a victim of life, rather than the author of our own life journey.

Pema Chodron, one of my favorite authors and Buddhist leaders has many thoughts on this in her book Comfortable With Uncertainty. She explains that the root of suffering, “What keeps us unhappy and stuck in a limited view of reality is our tendency to seek pleasure and avoid pain, to seek security and avoid groundlessness, to seek comfort and avoid discomfort.” She also says, “Our mind is always seeking zones of safety…We spend all our energy and waste our lives trying to re-create these zones of safety, which are always falling apart…the cycle of suffering comes from continuing to seek happiness in all the wrong places.“

So, at this point you’re thinking, um…YEAH?! I want to avoid pain, suffering and the unknown…. stick with me, it will make sense the further you read.

Later in the book she proposes that the path is the goal. We typically think that our path, or our life has a beginning, a middle and an end and we focus on the end, or sometimes we get stuck in the past but rarely are we actually fully living in the present. Also, this limited thinking about the structure of our journey causes us pain and discomfort with the unknown. Pema says, “This path has one very distinct characteristic; it is not prefabricated. It doesn’t already exist. The path that we’re talking about is the moment-by-moment evolution of our experience… the moment-by-moment evolution of our thoughts and emotions…When we realize that the path is the goal, there is a sense of workability. Everything that occurs in our confused mind we can regard as the path. Everything is workable.“

The last point that stands out in this book is, always maintain only a joyful mind. “Rather than appreciate where we are, we continually struggle and nurture our dissatisfaction. It’s like trying to get the flowers to grow by pouring cement on the garden.”

**QUICK VERSION**

Think about that. Very simply, I am saying that in the midst of change we will do best if we do the following:

1) Understand that change is normal and that our life is a series of adventures, not a firm beginning, middle and end.

2) When you are faced with a transition, get comfortable in the unknown and become a curious explorer of all things that are new in your life, rather than a fearless (and all-knowing) warrior that is set out to teach life a lesson, and misses out on what life has to teach us.

3) Finding joy, comfort and growth comes from being thankful and understanding that what we don’t know is perfectly okay and when we honor that our life is a fluid and ever-changing path, anything is possible and that is an amazing reality.

4) Growth and limitless living, thinking and believing come from our ability to face transition with an open heart rather than a guarded and closed attitude. You have all that you need right now, have fun with this transition. Change happens whether we try to control it or not, so save yourself the trouble and skip trying to control it. Simply live in the unknown.

If you skipped to this point, there are so many more revelations to enjoy, but you’ll have to walk the entire path of reading this post rather than skipping to the index for the answers. After all, the path is the goal…not the destination.

With tremendous love and respect for your journey and all growth moments within it,

Brittany

This week, I feel like a woman trapped in a snow globe that someone is shaking fervently. Floating all around me is opportunity, gratitude, amazement and much clarity. (What a great storm, eh?)

There are some shifts coming along in my professional life that I was not aware were on their way. I am incredibly thankful for and excited for the new adventure. In looking back over the last few months, I realize I spent so much energy being concerned over things that I had no control over. I felt a change coming on, and knew it was good but because I could not figure out where it was coming from or what it would look like, I was worried.

Isn’t it funny how a lack of control and understanding (and a lack of psychic ability, really!) can make us a little crazy?

I have realized that the Universe was holding on to this opportunity until I really sat silently in my own skin and soul and decided to fully commit to the town that I live in, the business I am running and the agency that I work for. I figured, if I don’t know what’s coming…why worry? I’ll commit and give the rest up to the powers that be. Literally a month later I’m moving into my new home, and being offered an incredible career opportunity.

I committed, told the Universe that I was serious and that I was open to whatever blessings it had coming my way, and they were delivered to my front door.

When you find yourself worried about life, ask yourself the following:

1.) Do I really have any say in what I am worried about?

2.) Am I concerned because I do not know what the outcome will be?

3.) What is the worst that would happen if I just let it go emotionally and lived from a place of gratitude?

4.) Can I commit to being open to the Universe delivering what is best for me, to me?

Once you get comfortable with answering these  questions you’ll find that you are wasting time, energy and effort on empty and unhealthy emotion, and you’ll let it go. If you let it go and commit to what you can actually commit to, the powers that be say, “Okay, we see that you are saving your powerful energy for better things to come, AND you are committed to be grateful regardless of your current circumstances – here are the answers you are looking for.”

You can call it meditation, prayer, faith, or whatever verbiage works for you and your value system. Either way, it’s worth your time to stop spending time on worry – and identify where the Universe is not delivering because it knows you secretly have not committed.

Your needs are heard, your desire will be answered when you get right with you.

With love,

Brittany

In a culture that is obsessed with getting business done, taking life by the horns and creating your reality… it can be tough to remember that life happens whether we do anything about it or not.

Is letting nature take its course your lesson today?

With love,

Brittany

So many people in this world live for the moment when the planets align just right, and life will be good.

~~~

When I get that raise, life will be perfect.

Once I meet that perfect someone, everything will fall into place.

Life is going to suck until I find the perfect place to live.

Once I get my degree, life is going to finally happen!

If I could just lose that last 10 pounds, then I might attract someone special.

~~~

The secret to living life intentionally is thriving exactly where you are, right now.

Think about it – You’ve seen flowers growing in a garden. They’re surrounded by other beautiful flowers, just like them – thriving and loving it! Then, one day you are walking down the side-walk and that very same breed of flower is bursting through the crack in the sidewalk – all by itself. There it is, in all it’s glory doing just fine. It’s brilliant and beautiful and strong, just like the other flowers in the garden – it just happens to be in different circumstances. It’s not concerned with why the other flowers are partying together, it’s having a party on its own!

You know why it’s doing so well? It is choosing to live its life to the fullest right where it’s at. Flowers have a limited life span [just like us] – why not start the moment they are aware of their options and GO! You have the same right, ability and circumstances to choose to love life now.

Thrive where you are planted.

It takes practice, especially if you’ve been waiting for that day. But, if you find yourself forgetting how incredible you are, or how many things in life you have to be grateful for – simply start again. The best thing about learning to thrive where you are planted is you have infinite possibilities to get it right.

So what are you waiting for?

With love,

Brittany

The only thing in this world that fear cannot devastate is integrity.

Know your own, act upon it incessantly, and you have nothing to worry about.

Have you ever heard the phrase, “know your limits”? It carries this connotation that we should know when we’re about to go to far, when we’re moving too fast or taking on too much. I find the phrase ironic because often times you don’t know you’ve hit your limits until after you’ve passed that line and you’re looking at yourself in the mirror and feeling a bit lost as to who is looking back at you.

You know your limits…you’ve reached them and waved at them as you zoomed by. There you stand looking back at that line and wondering how you reached it so fast without warning. Now the physical aftermath sets in. You’re tired, irritable and you feel like you’ve got nothing more to give. On a good day, you know you’ve agreed to take on way too much – on a bad day, everyone around you is responsible for your frustration.

I see this often – you can tell when someone has pushed themselves too hard. They show up late to everything, feel half engaged in everything they do, are not fully present in conversation and look as though their hair could be on fire and they would be too busy to notice. It’s not a pretty place to be – but it’s not a hopeless place to be.

As with everything in life – you have a choice.

One of the best ways to avoid surpassing your limits is to practice being 100% grounded in every commitment you make. Before you say yes, ask yourself if you truly want to do this or if you are accepting the invite because you feel obligated to. In fact, rather than saying yes immediately with the person on the phone or in person, tell them “Let me get back to you on that”, and then proceed with your decision after careful consideration of your precious time. Spend a few minutes weighing the pros and cons of committing and see how it feels in your body. Do you feel anxious or angry about saying yes? Then, that’s probably a no. If it makes you smile at the thought, or excitement fills your body – that’s a yes.

Beyond that – because this is not a black and white world – your answer could be a maybe. How often do you pull that one out of your pocket? Think about it this way – ‘maybe’ leaves you just enough breathing room to decline at the last-minute, which probably means you’ll feel much more open to the opportunity when the time comes.

If you’re reading this thinking, “Yeah – that’s great but I could have used this reminder a month ago, or a year ago” – the time to change your pattern is now. Get off the hamster wheel and decide only to get back on when it resonates in your soul. Even if it’s only a small change like taking 5 minutes to stretch before you set off on your day, or a hot bath at the end of the day – you will be reminded of the significance of your well-being and how joyful and pleasing taking care of you feels, even if only for a few moments. Then, add to those moments until you have built-in enough self-honoring time that you feel comfortable in your level of giving and receiving energy.

I fully recognize that every single one of us has very important personal and professional commitments. I’m not encouraging you to give up everything and move to Tahiti (unless that resonates with your soul, of course). I am asking you to realize here and now how crucial you are to our world and that in order to fulfill your unique position here on earth – you must make a habit of filling your own bucket before you share the excess.

Start now. I am absolutely positive that you have 5 minutes to do something for you – so, what are you waiting for?

~Brittany

It can be so difficult to say exactly what we want to say. Fear can consume us when it comes to speaking our truth, and in all reality – it shouldn’t. Ultimately – if you apply 3 questions to your fear, and the answers still resonate in your soul as needing to be said – go for it.

Ask yourself:

1.) Are you coming from kindness?

This is so important because you could be speaking your truth, and your truth could be negative and harmful in nature. If you are saying what you need to say, and it is grounded in kindness (even if the person could be hurt by your expression), then it’s the best you could do; so share it. Their reaction and feelings afterwards are out of your control and 100% their responsibility.

2.) Is what you want to say representative of your authentic self?

When you ask yourself this, think on if you are saying something out of immediate rage, frustration and fear. Are you lashing out at the person, or have you thought through what your feelings are and are ready to present them feeling fully grounded in your feelings and words?

3.) Even if the person you are speaking to reacts negatively, would it change how you feel about what you shared?

If the person lashes back at you, gets hurt, or refuses to speak to you for a few weeks… do you still feel like what you want to say is your truth? Most of the time, the answer is “Yes!” Even if the person reacts negatively you might feel badly afterwards (nobody likes confrontation or social awkwardness) but your truth was woven in that interaction, and presented with kindness.

Let the rest go.

Your truth matters. Share it and share it often, in fact – make it a habit to speak your truth. Before you know it – you won’t need to run through the 3 questions, it will be your nature to speak open and honestly.

With respect for your inherent integrity,

~Brittany